silence.

The last four days I have been confined to my lovely double sized bed, due to a bad cold. My room, splashed with the color of the ocean on the walls, clothes all over the floor, a world map, tons of pictures, and lots of books, has consumed me the last few days. I physically do not want to clean up this mess due to the fact that it stresses me out. Since I need to rest to feel better I have been picking up books here and there from my shelf, most of them half read. One of the books "Soul Graffiti" by Mark Scandrette, was given to me as a gift when I graduated from high school. It is solely focused on the authenticity of living our lives for Jesus. The author works in the inner city of San Francisco. There was a page where he spoke about a girl who could not be in silence due to the lack of noise in her life.

Michele, an Ivy League graduate from the upper east side of Manhattan, sat on Mark's couch and was on a quest to understand Jesus. Somehow Mark ventured to say,

"The Hebrew scriptures suggest that everything made somehow reveals the glory of God. The Earth, in a sense, is the voice of God romancing us. Michele, I think that if you went alone to a park, out into the words, or on a walk along the beach and became very quiet- you would hear the voice of God speaking to you."

Tears began streaming down Michele's face. "You don't understand how impossible that would be for me. I cannot be alone or still. I am constantly listening to music or talking on the phone. I rarely go to bed before 3 a.m and usually not witout more than a few drinks. I even sleep with the stereo turned up and the lights on. If i were alone I would have to face myself. And I am afraid of what I would find."

I heard, in Michele's voice, a hunger for peace and longing for a story that makes sense of all that she has seen.

After being in bed for the last few days, I realized I have not been listening to music. Today I thought "What have I been doing the last few days?" I will tell you what... God has been so good to me in this silence. The last few days I have been confused as why I always get sick and how my "call" to missions can make sense if I have a ton of medical problems. I still don't know that question, but I do know God is faithful and good.

After reading an excerpt from this book I am realized how thankful I am for the spiritual discipline of silence. From silence springs forth prayer...