a dug up essay on GRACE

today i was going through some of my essays i wrote in my advance composition class... and i really like this one and it reminded me of God's glorious and wonderful God's grace is!

What is grace? Grace means a couple things to me: something almost unexplainable, a door to which we have access through Christ, and a gift from God. Its something I will never be able to grasp the full meaning of until I meet Jesus in heaven. It's something that defines why I am able to respond to a holy God, why I feel at peace with myself, my surroundings, and others, and most importantly it's why my heart is able to love. Now to some people that might sound like bogus and a whole bunch of gibberish. To me its something I hold onto and cherish. The most important thing to understand about grace is that it's a gift, not an earned present.
Recently I've been literally going nuts on the concept of Grace. It's something that has changed my view on everything, changed my heart, changed my thinking, and is really changing my whole relationship with Christ. It's turning things upside down and bringing me closer to the one I love the most. Grace is given for a lot of reasons and the biggest is because we are sinners and are saved by GRACE. It's all because I've realized I'm a ragamuffin. One might ask what's a Ragamuffin? A ragamuffin is not someone who is not for muscular Christians who have made chuck Norris there hero. It is not hooded mystics who want magic in their religion. Its not alleluia Christians who live only on mountaintops and have never visited the valley of desolation. Its not people who are fearless and tear less. It's not for people who claim "all these commandments I have kept from all my youth." its not for legalists who would rather surrender control of their souls to rules then run the risk of living in union with Christ. The gospel of grace (gospels in the bible, and even the bible as a whole) was written for ragamuffins. It's for the bedraggled, beat up and burnt out people who don't know what they are doing in life. It's for people who feel so burdened that they feel like their heart is sinking to the depths of the ocean. It's for people who are wobbly and weak—kneed who know they don't have it all together and are too proud to accept the hand out of God's amazing grace. It's for the inconsistent people, who are unsteady disciples. It's for the poor, the weak, sinful men and women. It's for people who have no hope. It's for the bent and bruised who feel that their lives are a grave of disappointment to God. It's for smart people who know they are being dumb with their lives. It's for anyone who is willing to look beyond themselves.
The gospel of grace nullifies our adulation of televangelist's charismatic superstars, and local church heroes. It obliterates the two class citizenship theory operative in many American churches today. Grace proclaims the awesome truth that all is gift. Crazy isn't it? That all is gift. All that is good is ours, not because it's a right, but because of the sheer bounty of a gracious God. While there's a lot of things that we can earn, like our degrees, money so we can go waste it on the newest I-pod, our home and garden, and even a good nights sleep, all of this is possible only because we have been given so much. We have been given a mouth to speak out of, a mind to think up ideas and share them with others, feet to walk and feel the earth, hands to comfort others, a heart to beat with love, eyes to see the beautiful earth the lord has created, and much more! To a believer (and to anyone who wants to come along for the invitation: think about this) who is even seeking this idea of grace: god is in our souls and Jesus is in our flesh! Because of Jesus we have the power to believe where others deny, hoping when theirs despair, to love when others hurt. All of this is a gift from above. Its not because I've earned a good education at Foothill High school, because I've kissed my mom or dad goodnight, said a thousand prayers to God in one day, or even because I smiled at a lonely stranger. Our being is even a gift of God. I am confident that I am deeply loved by Jesus Christ and that I have done nothing to earn or deserve the love of Christ. This is called Grace. It's not only for people who love the lord, but it's already been given to all.
Lets look a little closer at what the Meriam Webster Dictionary says about Grace. Meriam says grace is charm, thanks, pleasing, grateful, a virtue coming from God, a state of sanctification enjoyed through divine grace, approval, favor, a special favor, privilege, his place by right, a short prayer at meal time asking for a blessing or giving thanks, beauty, and much more. Now I guess all of these things can go under the topic of grace, but it doesn't fully capture what Grace is. Grace can never fully be captured because our minds are so finite. When I asked my classmates what Grace meant their responses were a ballerina when she's moving, someone helping another, Mother Teresa, a prayer catholic people say, and something people strive for. At that moment, I knew I had to write this essay to define what it meant to me. It's something that is so important to me and something I can't even fully grasp. But its because of grace I have been saved. It's because of God's grace I have been blessed with so many things, with life it's self. Its because of his grace I am able to share the love of Christ. If any Ragamuffin wants to take one thing from this essay, all I ask is that you understand that grace is a wonderful GIFT from God and there is nothing, nothing that you can do to deserve it.

AZ, roommate, and thoughts.

it is so weird being back from Arizona. i miss it a lot already. i love the stillness of quiet places and being surrounded by people i love. and instead i'm cleaning my room and going to the doctor today haha. but still the Lord is continuing to confirm things to my heart that i've been trying to figure out. today i was just thinking about loquita, kristy, Juanita, and JJ. i slept with them a couple nights but one of the nights i was feeling kind of down and i walked in.. and they were awake. they asked if they could pray with me and they were so excited! they shared bible stories with me and why jesus died on the cross for us. they were telling me about Jesus! it was so wonderful. my heart just melted and i really feel like the Lord uses children a lot for me to learn things about him and to realize things about myself.

p.s. i found out my other roommate who is from san leandro.. is actually from turkey haha. so i guess she has some family member whos in san leandro. it should be very multi cultural in my room. really exciting.

back from AZ!

hey everyone,
it is late! i got home and rushed to my computer to read lauren wallace's blog. i've been so anxious to read it all week... so i decided to write about our wonderful arizona outreach! we left last friday morning and well we just got back from 10:30 tonight! it went by soooo fast and it all seems like a dream to me for some reason! it went by faster then any mission trip i've ever gone on. it was very chill and very very fun! never a dull moment and always fun. this year i served on basketball camp again, which was delightful and challenging. the Lord was completely at work and blessed our time there. i'd say this was one of my first AZ mission trips where i was seeking, focusing, and being real with God. in return he blessed me. something i find miraculous was that i wasn't tired barley at all! i prayed for strength daily and the lord answered my prayer, and for those of you who know me know i get tired SOOO easily. basketball camp was so fun because i got to see all the kids i saw last year and form new friendships. all the people on basketball staff were super fun and it was such a good group. irene, meghan, chris, tony deblasio, muriel, tony santoro, dan bowen, darlene, chad, and rachel howden weer all apart of that! well thats just a tid bit for now and i'll keep updating this with what God did there and is continuing to do here... and with some fun stories.

college update at a very late hour

friends friends friends.
i have found out my classes.
my dorm.
and my roommateS. yes thats plural.
haha.

okay lets start out with cool stuff.
i have 2 roommates. i thought i had one all along but i searched the portal website of biola and found out i am living in a triple. one roommate is Justine from El Paso, TX! she seems rad and is majoring in intercultural studies as well. the other girl is grace and i have no idea how to contact her (i haven't gotten my housing packet yet, i found this all on the portal website... and its all true haha)... so hopefully i can contact her soon. she is majoring in music composition! exciting! i hope it will work out living with 2 other girls, not catty, but i'm sure it will be fine! since i already know one of my roommates is AMAZING, i can't imagine the other one being any different.

next up i am living in the best dorm ever! its smack dab in the middle of biola...
and drum roll please...
its horton! a couple years old and so freaking nice!
i am on the first floor! ya ya!!

and then my classes are freaking awesome. only 13 units for me 1st semester. i have to prove to biola i can get good grades haha.

okay so
first semester seminar: intercultural studies
english: crit thinking and writing
general anthropology
foundations/global studies
foundations of christian thought
and college skills: excel haha a tutoring thing

how wonderful is that! and no classes on fridays! none that early, except for monday morning at 8... and none to late so i can sleep haha.

ahh oh the blessings that God has given me! seriously thought. God is sooo good!

today i woke up and could not get out of bed. i got to church 45 minutes late and well i still got to listen to what mark porter said, which was wonderful. and then we went into big service and did a little thing for AZ... and it was so encouraging! people just came up to all of us and let us know they would be praying for us. so nice. after wards we had dance practice haha which was hilarious... and hard. lets just say i am not coordinated. now i'm off to mels for a BBQ. man i love my friends.


man laurens leaving in 4 days.
so sad
so exciting
and soooo sadddd.

hello mid summer!

hi everyone! yesterday i went to the wonderful city of san francisco to talk to homeless people where tony reminded me that i had a blog. haha so its time to get back on it!
this summer has been really exciting and thrilling, but very very busy! i'm amazed by how fast time goes by and theres no stopping it haha.
so i'll give you a summmary of my summer haha.
week uno: my wonderful cousins, patrick and jenny, and my uncle bill came out to CA to surprise me! oh and they are from texas and drove here! i was surprised at meghans grad party haha. that week i went to yosemite, worked (waterslides- aka really fun job/super easy)... and did many other fun things.
week dos: i had my graduation party! which was really nice and fun. i loved seeing family friends and just hanging out. it couldn't of gone better! the next day i went to lake sisikyou with the micheffs, the gross family, and the o'mallys. it was sooo much fun and northern california is sooo beautiful. and when i say northern i mean shasta area. ah love it.
week tres: finally i got to relax... hung out with friends, worked a whole bunch.
and now its
week cuatro: i worked this week, 4 days, found out i wouldn't be able to go to biola but through a TONNNN of prayer- thank you all who prayed, i am able to go! short story: i had about six thousand in grants from biola and they were taken away because of my moms tax form. pretty much she owns a house in palm dessert that was added to her income.. so it looked like we didn't need the grants haha which we did. so yess monday was such an aweful but exciting day. i turned right to the lord and i knew he would work it out and i just want to follow his will. he totally blessed it and my dad figured a way to make it work. i am soooo blessed to have parents who are so willing to sacrifice money and let me go to a wonderful school! okay soo also this week bought things for college, went to SF to talk/pray with homeless- made a rad friend named frita- be praying for her to get back up on her feet.. and tonight we are having a bbq for my dads birthday.

on friday i am off to AZ for a mission trip, and then august 5th i am going to hawaii with meghan, emily, my sister, and my dad. and then i get back the 12th, and leave for school the 16th or 17th.. i haven't decided yet. soo a lot of time at all! there are so many people i still want to see and i still need to get college stuff!

sometime this week i find out my roommate... i just hope i find out before friday haha or else thats not going to be fun! anyways god bless :)