My desire for this year

My one and up-most desire for this year is to...

have a servants heart and to truly find joy in serving others. Jesus must increase and I must decrease.


I have been praying about this and today Rebecca in SMU told me that she had a dream about this. Funny how the Holy Spirit works.

Bring it Lord. Bring it.
And friends... keep me accountable to this. Thank you :)

Back at a place i have grown to call "home"

It takes a lot for me to start to call something home. Biola has become a place over the last three years, going on four, where it actually feels like home. Driving off the 5 onto the lovely Firestone, making a right onto Rosecrans, and then left onto Biola Avenue has become a drive that is not only comforting, but feels right. Most of you know, or should know by now, that the only other place that I consider home is my home in Pleasanton (lived there from 4 years old until now).

I started up work (which has been basically a lot of hanging out) on Thursday with SMU/AS. I have loved every single second of it and feel so blessed by the people I get to work with (which consist of a LOT of my friends- score). We will be spending lots of time together so it is so good to just be enjoying each others company before school gets a hold of us and life gets a little wild.

A lot of my close friends have returned from internships/mission trips from all over the place including Calcutta, Peru, New York City, Zambia and many more places. I have been blessed with a lot of people who have an international mindset, yet see the desperate need in America as well. It has been an encouragement to me.

Every summer I feel like very random things happen to me. Actually my whole life has been pretty random and totally unexpected.This summer was kind of nuts and a lot of unexpected things happened. God answered some crazy prayers and had me learn some hard lessons as well. I learned a lot about love this summer and what it really means. When I say I learned what it really means, I just learned what it takes to really love and how God wants us to love Him. I have not particularly mastered the action quite yet- working on it (which will be a life long lesson for sure). The book of James has been teaching me a thing or two with this.

I have been alone in my apartment the last few days, which has actually turned out to be great. I have been able to really reflect on summer and what I want out of this next year. I bought a journal today just for senior year- so I can see how God worked throughout the year. I need to be faithful to that sucker!

I want this year to be God's. I have no idea what I want to do with my life and where God will take me, all I know is that I want to follow Him. I want to pray more and I want to learn how to be a better servant (which worked out because my job at school aligns perfectly with that). God needs to become more and I need to become less.

Biola is my second home. It is so nice. I walked outside my apartment yesterday and I know almost everyone in my apartment complex- talk about getting the hook up. I am so excited for this year and really sad that it is my last at Biola. I guess this means I need to really embrace every day- and not waste it away!

jesus, people & love.

When Jesus had called the Twelve together, he gave them power and authority to drive out all demons and to cure diseases, and he sent them out to preach the kingdom of God and to heal the sick. He told them: "Take nothing for the journey—no staff, no bag, no bread, no money, no extra tunic. Whatever house you enter, stay there until you leave that town. If people do not welcome you, shake the dust off your feet when you leave their town, as a testimony against them." So they set out and went from village to village, preaching the gospel and healing people everywhere. Luke 9

I think that there are some hidden secrets in this passage. Jesus tells us over and over again throughout the gospels that there is power in His name. We will sing about it at church and talk about, but sometimes I forget that there truly is power in Jesus name. When I pray and truly feel like God is listening, despite my emotions of the moment, and say "in Jesus name," there is a power that comes over me. There is a lot of power in Jesus name.

I also struggle with the fact of saying "Oh yeah- let me just leave all my food, my money, and make absolutely no plans." That stresses me out, especially because I am a crisis-oriented person. For most kids in America we grew up hearing "be responsible" from our parents daily. Making plans is what we do for the future and if you are not already saving for your retirement by age thirty, then something is terribly wrong. You should just say "adios" now because you will be dying by the time you are sixty. Or at least that is what it feels like. The fact of the matter is that most of us aren't going to leave all of our things and go preach in villages, but God desperately wants us to be in a place where we are fully reliant on Him. It is in that place where joy comes. It is in that place where we realize that God truly does care and wants to care for our needs- emotional, physical, spiritual, social, etc. If we believe that God created this Universe, if God created us, if God knows all history (past, present, and future), than why on earth don't I rely on Him more for the little things- let alone the big things?

Since some of us are not going to be going to the rural bush of Africa, to the high desert mountains of Pakistan, or the jungles of Peru. We can make friends right here in Los Angeles. There are people everywhere. Did you know that there are over 100 recorded languages in LA and way more that are not even recorded- due to the influx of immigrants and foreigners? P.s. Got that figure from a Professor- not sure where he got it so do not quote me on it. I just love this, so much. I get so excited meeting people- probably due to my personality. If I could make it a goal, I would meet someone new every day. There is always a way to relate with someone- you just have to find the common ground.


Sorry I am going on a tangent. I just get really excited about these things. Last weekend I went to Echo Park with a friend and to my surprise we were the only white people in the midst of hundreds of Latin American families. I was in love. It was so comfortable- despite my lack of Spanish. The same thing goes when I go to Arabic Festivals. Maybe something is wrong with me. P.s. Recently I feel like my life is going to turn out like the lady in "Pray Eat Love."

So ending point: Jesus' name is strong. He wants us to rely on Him- which really is worth it. He wants us to be a light because after all we are imagine bearers.

wv and interests

first of all, i am loving working at world vision. i think it is such a great opportunity to dive into an organization that cares so deeply about the heart of God and the oppressed. the things that they talk about are so beautifully displayed in the bible- that it makes my heart pound with passion. i love my position- summer student of the governance dept. i find everything that i am learning extremely interesting and applicable- so that's good! my co-workers are awesome and we have devotions daily as a team. i have become friends with all the other interns and i must say we have a good bunch :)

on another note, i was just thinking of how much i like melanne verver. if some of you don't know her check her out- here is her bio. i had the opportunity to hear her at one of the first hearings on the international violence against woman's act on the senate side with john kerry. the way she conducts herself and presses forward with the cause of women rights is commendable.

in other news... check on these websites. they are intriguing, interesting, and things that i want to get more involved with/more educated on.

Vital Voices
Council on Foreign Relations
Women's Foreign Policy Group

i wish i was at this hearing. guess i will have to listen to it on webcast.

Dear 2010,

I would like a year that is healthy, meaningful, intentional, and full of growth in my love for Jesus.

When I say healthy, I mean not in the hospital and no more diagnoses of diseases. When I say meaningful, I mean to make the most of every situation and to see the value of life's uncertainties. When I say intentional, I am piggy-backing "meaningful." Intentional also goes along with spending more time with the Lord. After all, Gary said on Sunday at church if you are not spending time with the Lord daily it is not because you don't have the time, it is because of where your priorities are. When I say full of growth, I want to flourish. I want to be a flower that blossoms in a healthy manner. Of course full of obstacles, but full of truth and assurance that I will growth, I will flourish, and will become something that the Lord is pleased with. I know the Lord loves me and is pleased, I just know He can be glorified a lot more.

Lord, mold me and make me who you desire me to be... for your glory and not mine.

Love,
Angela

Goal Number One

Christmas break goal number one:
Re-teach myself how to play the piano.

My heart feels as if it is going to burst with joy when my ears meet the beautiful harmony of a piano. My day is complete when I can sit and enjoy listening to someone play the piano. Whether it be at Nordstrom’s or in my living room, I love it. Growing up playing the piano and letting it go was not one of my finest choices. I need to get back to the place of where it is just me and the piano. Me and the music. Nothing else.

It is a beautiful thing when you can tune out all matters and focus on that moment, then, and there. Music flowing from your heart, to your fingers, can create an out pour of joy...

Hm, take me to this place goal number one. It’s been a good eight years.